🎉300+Funny Joke Birthday Cards

Because Cake Isn’t the Only Thing That Should Make You Laugh! 🎂😂
Looking for the perfect birthday card that says “I remembered your big day… and still managed to roast you”? You’re in the right place! From laugh-out-loud puns to cheeky one-liners, these 300+ funny joke birthday cards are packed with humor that’s fresher than today’s memes.

Whether you’re going for sweet, dreadful or straight-up silly, there’s a card here that’ll leave them cracking up long after the candles are blown out!

😎 Dad Joke Birthday Cards

😂 I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
😅 You’re not old… you’re just well-seasoned.
😆 Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!
🤣 You’re aging like milk—just kidding, you’re still sharp!
😜 What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
😁 I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She hugged me.
🤪 Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!
😂 How do cows stay young? They moo-ve a lot!
😆 I used to play piano by ear, now I use my hands.
😝 You know you’re old when your candles cost more than the cake!
🤣 What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
😅 Aging is mandatory, growing up is optional.
😂 Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field!
😄 You’re not old, you’re just… retro!
😜 Another year older? Time to embrace that dad bod!

😂 Funny Joke Birthday Cards

🤣 You’re not old, you’re 25 plus shipping and handling.
😆 Don’t worry, wrinkles are just smile lines in the wrong places.
😝 You age like a fine banana.
😂 Cake calories don’t count on your birthday.
🤪 Congrats on surviving another year without being abducted by aliens.
😅 Birthdays are like sneezes—better with friends and cake.
😄 You’re not getting older, just more distinguished…ly weird.
😜 You bring joy to everyone… when you leave the room.
😂 Here’s your annual reminder you’re closer to senior discounts.
🤣 At your age, naps are a gift, not a weakness.
😆 May your day be filled with cake and bad decisions.
😁 Don’t count the candles, just enjoy the glow.
😂 Another year, another excuse to not act your age.
😝 Smile! It’s your day to pretend you’re still young.
🤪 Party like your knees don’t hurt tomorrow!

🎈 Joke Birthday Cards for Him

😂 You still look great… from across the room… in the dark.
😆 You’re not losing hair—you’re gaining head.
😜 At your age, “rise and shine” means something different.
😝 Getting older is like leveling up—with more joint pain.
🤣 May your dad bod grow stronger each year!
😅 You’ve aged like fine whiskey… slightly burnt and always extra.
😂 Another year closer to those orthopedic shoes.
😆 Happy birthday! You’re now a classic… like VHS.
🤪 Don’t worry, bald is the new sexy.
😄 Your birthday suit could use a little ironing.
😜 You’re still hot—just in flashes.
🤣 You’re a real man of mystery… mostly about your age.
😝 Keep calm and remember where you left your glasses.
😂 Aging like a rockstar—louder and slightly offbeat.
😅 Hope your birthday is as solid as your hairline used to be.

😏 Dirty Joke Birthday Cards

😈 You’re like a birthday cake—moist, irresistible, and gone too fast.
😂 Let’s make this birthday dirtier than your search history.
😜 You put the “raunch” in “raunchy card.”
🤪 Getting older means more candles and less stamina.
😈 May your birthday be filled with adult decisions and bad ideas.
😆 You’re so old your safe word is “Ibuprofen.”
😂 Hope your birthday’s as dirty as your browser history.
😜 Still sexy… in a vintage kind of way.
😝 Blow out the candles—then I’ll blow your… mind!
😅 At your age, Netflix and chill turns into nap and Advil.
🤣 Here’s to another year of faking innocence.
😈 You’re not old, you’re just experienced… very experienced.
😜 Hope your day ends with candles and someone tied up!
😆 You age like a dirty meme—gets better every year.
😂 Happy birthday! Let’s get naughty… or nap.

🤓 Funny Dad Joke Birthday Cards

😅 I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
😂 Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
😝 I ordered a chicken and an egg online… I’ll let you know.
🤣 Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
😆 What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
😜 I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
😁 You’re not old, just older than dirt with a better Wi-Fi plan.
🤪 Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
😂 I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
😄 Want a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.
😝 Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything!
😆 You still got it… somewhere… under all that back pain.
😅 Happy birthday! Now go do something you’ll regret—but take a nap first.
🤣 I’d tell you a birthday joke, but it’s a little mature for your age.
😜 Another year, another excuse for dad jokes!

🆓 Funny Birthday Cards (Free)

😂 Download this joke: You’re so old, your birth certificate says “expired.”
😆 Free smile with every birthday wish!
🤣 This card cost $0—just like your fashion sense.
😜 This card is free… just like your time now that you’re retired.
😅 Who needs money when you’ve got a sarcastic friend?
😂 This joke is 100% free, unlike your hair.
😝 Cheap card, rich humor.
😄 A priceless joke for a priceless friend.
🤪 Free printable joke: You’re not old, just heavily used.
😂 Save money, spend laughs.
😆 You’re the reason e-cards were invented.
😅 Here’s your free trial of laughter. No refunds.
🤣 Budget birthday, premium humor.
😜 This card cost nothing… just like your respect for bedtimes.
😂 Laughter is free—just like your birthday wish!

🤭 Rude Birthday Cards

😈 You’re not old… just prehistoric.
😝 Smile while you still have teeth.
😂 At your age, candles are a fire hazard.
😅 You bring everyone so much joy… when you leave the room.
🤪 Another year closer to “back in my day.”
😜 You’re so old, your blood type is discontinued.
🤣 You’re not ugly… just uniquely unfortunate.
😆 Remember when you were young and full of hope? Me neither.
😁 You’re proof that age doesn’t always come with wisdom.
😂 You’ve got something on your chin… no, the third one.
😝 So old you fart dust.
🤣 Congrats on another lap around the sun… now take a nap.
😈 Your face makes onions cry.
😅 I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
😂 You’re older than Google!

👯 Funny Birthday Cards for Friends

😂 Friends like you make getting old almost worth it.
🤪 You’re still younger than you’ll be tomorrow!
😆 Age is just a number… and yours is terrifying.
😝 You’re like a fine wine—cheap, boxed, and better with chips.
😜 Here’s to you: old, bold, and slightly moldy.
🤣 Our friendship is like this card—questionable but heartfelt.
😅 We’re at the age where “wild night” means staying up past 10.
😂 Happy birthday! Now act your shoe size.
😁 Another year, still no wisdom.
😆 You’re my favorite antique.
🤪 Your birthday gift? My presence and sarcasm.
😂 You’re still younger than your browser history suggests.
😄 If I had a dollar for every birthday you’ve had, I’d be rich… and so would you.
😜 Besties don’t let besties age alone.
🤣 Aging with friends makes it less weird—and more fun.

🎉 Conclusion

No matter the personality or age, joke birthday cards make birthdays brighter and much more entertaining. From dad jokes to dirty punchlines, the perfect laugh is just a card away. Choose your favorite from this collection and spread the joy—one joke at a time!

Silva

Silva is a humor enthusiast and pun aficionado who loves turning everyday situations into laugh-out-loud moments. With a keen eye for witty wordplay and a knack for relatable jokes, Silva brings a unique, playful perspective to every article. When not crafting clever puns, Silva enjoys exploring pop culture trends and sharing funny anecdotes that brighten readers’ days. Follow Silva’s hilarious adventures and discover endless chuckles at jokesplanets.com.