Welcome to the ultimate collection of 300+ Blonde Jokes that are playful, outrageous, and guaranteed to leave you light-headed from laughter.
From classic blonde “oops” moments to modern meme-worthy punchlines, these jokes don’t just walk the line—they trip over it in high heels and giggle the whole way down. 💄✨
Ready to laugh at the most iconic hair color in joke history? Let’s go blonde and bold! 💁♀️Blondes may have more fun—but they also inspire some of the funniest jokes on the internet. 💁♀️
This mega list of 300+ blonde jokes is packed with silly setups, hilarious punchlines, and laugh-out-loud one-liners that never go out of style. Whether you’re blonde, brunette, or bald — get ready to laugh your roots off! 😆
Blond Joke Drink Coke
🥤 Why did the blond put her Coke in the freezer? She wanted it to “chill out.”
🥤 The blond thought Diet Coke was for people on a spiritual cleanse.
🥤 She brought a straw to a can-opening contest.
🥤 Blond: “I microwaved my Coke because I wanted it warm and bubbly.”
🥤 She shook the Coke bottle, then blamed it for exploding.
🥤 Blond asked if Coca-Cola comes from the Coca tree.
🥤 She ordered a Coke without calories—got a glass of air.
🥤 Thought Coke Zero meant there was literally no Coke inside.
🥤 Asked if Coke has a morning version like coffee.
🥤 Brought Coke to a wine tasting.
🥤 Blond: “If I mix Coke with Red Bull, will I fly faster?”
🥤 She froze Coke to “trap the fizz.”
🥤 Said Coke is best shaken, not stirred.
🥤 Blond told Siri to pour her a Coke.
🥤 Used Coke as shampoo because “it says it adds body.”
What is a Blond Joke Drink
🍹 Blond ordered a screwdriver and asked for real tools.
🍹 She thought a Bloody Mary was a medical drink.
🍹 Tried to “light” her flaming shot with a flashlight.
🍹 Asked if a Long Island Iced Tea comes in family size.
🍹 Thought a tequila sunrise was a morning drink.
🍹 Asked the bartender to make her a “mocha mojito.”
🍹 Mixed coffee with gin and called it “energy regret.”
🍹 Thought an Old Fashioned was something her grandma drank.
🍹 Ordered “liquid courage” and got mouthwash.
🍹 Blond brought her own blender to the bar.
🍹 She added Red Bull to champagne and called it “bubbly wings.”
🍹 Called rum and Coke “pirate cola.”
🍹 Used margarita salt in her bath.
🍹 Thought tonic water was for sick drinks.
🍹 Asked if Irish coffee has an accent.
Blond Joke Brothers
👱♀️ Blond’s brother got locked in a grocery store and starved.
👱♀️ One brother glued the puzzle—then complained it wouldn’t work again.
👱♀️ The other thought Wi-Fi was short for “wife finder.”
👱♀️ They tried to wash a USB drive.
👱♀️ One brother wore a helmet to bed “for dream safety.”
👱♀️ The other one posted a letter through a vending machine.
👱♀️ They played hide and seek and never found each other.
👱♀️ Blond’s brothers thought “Netflix and chill” meant blanket shopping.
👱♀️ Argued over whether the sun or moon is bigger.
👱♀️ Asked if email stamps need licking.
👱♀️ One asked Alexa to do his math homework.
👱♀️ The other thought CTRL+Z undoes spilled milk.
👱♀️ Called Bluetooth a dental condition.
👱♀️ One tried to charge his phone with a lemon.
👱♀️ Said Siri is their third sibling.
Dirty Blond Joke
😏 Blond studied for a urine test.
😏 She thought a strip club was a place to buy wallpaper.
😏 Called 911 because her vibrator had a dead battery.
😏 Used whipped cream as hair mousse.
😏 Thought “booty call” was shoe shopping.
😏 Said she was grounded—because she plugged in too many toys.
😏 Got fired from a nude beach for being overdressed.
😏 Asked why adult movies don’t have bloopers.
😏 Thought a G-string was guitar equipment.
😏 Wore edible underwear to a salad bar.
😏 Said “Netflix and chill” means pajamas and popcorn.
😏 Told her diary she wants to be a pole dancer.
😏 Blond applied body glitter for a Zoom interview.
😏 Thought a threesome was a math term.
😏 Said she uses whipped cream as sunscreen for flavor.
Blond Joke Firework
🎆 Blond tried to light fireworks with a flashlight.
🎆 She thought a sparkler was a fancy pen.
🎆 Set fireworks off in the house to “test them first.”
🎆 Asked if fireworks come with a mute option.
🎆 Wore sunglasses at night to “watch responsibly.”
🎆 Put sparklers in her birthday cake.
🎆 Tried to light fireworks with a scented candle.
🎆 Asked if fireworks were vegan.
🎆 Thought Roman candles were imported from Italy.
🎆 Threw firecrackers in the freezer “for safety.”
🎆 Called 911 when the fireworks were too loud.
🎆 Thought firework shows were natural events.
🎆 Brought a fire extinguisher as a plus-one.
🎆 Lit fireworks indoors because “the wind messes them up.”
🎆 Told people she invented fireworks by accident.
Blond Joke Meme
📸 Blond meme: “Tried to connect to Bluetooth… now dating a speaker.”
📸 Meme of blond blow-drying her ice cubes.
📸 Caption: “Microwave your salad to kill the calories.”
📸 She put a ruler on her phone to measure memory.
📸 Blond using nail polish to fix a broken iPad.
📸 Meme of her Googling “how to use Google.”
📸 Holding a plunger as a microphone.
📸 Blond holding a fish with the caption: “My cat’s Wi-Fi pet.”
📸 Drawing a USB port on the wall to charge her phone.
📸 Wearing oven mitts to use the toaster.
📸 Meme of her typing “LOL” in a voicemail.
📸 Trying to print a TikTok.
📸 Said “VPN” is a new energy drink.
📸 Blond using a pizza as a mouse pad.
📸 Meme: “Reboot your fridge for a cold start.”
Blond Joke Memes
😂 A meme where she tried to bleach her brain.
😂 Meme of her mailing a text message.
😂 Used lipstick to sign a PDF.
😂 Said she updated her car by yelling “refresh.”
😂 Blond set her alarm for 12 PM and missed the day.
😂 Believed “cloud storage” meant sky drive.
😂 Using a banana as a phone in a meeting.
😂 Her browser history includes “how to Google.”
😂 Drew a clock on her wrist instead of buying a watch.
😂 Believed incognito mode made her invisible.
😂 Meme caption: “I reset the microwave clock to fix the internet.”
😂 Thought Amazon Prime is a superhero.
😂 Said 5G causes spicy food.
😂 Blond using Instagram filters in a mirror.
😂 Meme: “I clicked uninstall on life—waiting for it to reboot.”
Blond Joke of The Day
🌞 Blond tried to climb the glass elevator for exercise.
🌞 Said her credit score is high because she memorized it.
🌞 Asked if the moon has Wi-Fi.
🌞 Got a job at the mirror factory—still waiting to see herself succeed.
🌞 Said shampoo instructions are confusing—“I never know when to stop.”
🌞 Thought a resume is a list of her favorite TV shows.
🌞 Mistook a stapler for a phone charger.
🌞 She reported her reflection as an intruder.
🌞 Asked if the library has an audiobook section for selfies.
🌞 Said water is heavy when it’s “wet.”
🌞 Tried to inflate her tires with a hairdryer.
🌞 Blond: “I downloaded more RAM from a shopping site.”
🌞 Said fast food is food you eat while running.
🌞 Tried to crop her hair using Photoshop.
🌞 Told Siri: “I’m ready to upgrade my brain.”
Conclusion
Blond jokes are timeless, cheeky, and perfect for sharing laughs without taking life too seriously. Whether you like your humor clean, dirty, meme-styled, or themed—this list offers it all. Laugh responsibly and share generously!
