Welcome to the ultimate collection of 300+ Blonde Jokes that are playful, outrageous, and guaranteed to leave you light-headed from laughter.
From classic blonde “oops” moments to modern meme-worthy punchlines, these jokes don’t just walk the line—they trip over it in high heels and giggle the whole way down. 💄✨
Ready to laugh at the most iconic hair color in joke history? Let’s go blonde and bold! 💁♀️Blondes may have more fun—but they also inspire some of the funniest jokes on the internet. 💁♀️
This mega list of 300+ blonde jokes is packed with silly setups, hilarious punchlines, and laugh-out-loud one-liners that never go out of style. Whether you’re blonde, brunette, or bald — get ready to laugh your roots off! 😆
Blond Joke Drink Coke
🥤 Why did the blond put her Coke in the freezer? She wanted it to “chill out.”
🥤 The blond thought Diet Coke was for people on a spiritual cleanse.
🥤 She brought a straw to a can-opening contest.
🥤 Blond: “I microwaved my Coke because I wanted it warm and bubbly.”
🥤 She shook the Coke bottle, then blamed it for exploding.
🥤 Blond asked if Coca-Cola comes from the Coca tree.
🥤 She ordered a Coke without calories—got a glass of air.
🥤 Thought Coke Zero meant there was literally no Coke inside.
🥤 Asked if Coke has a morning version like coffee.
🥤 Brought Coke to a wine tasting.
🥤 Blond: “If I mix Coke with Red Bull, will I fly faster?”
🥤 She froze Coke to “trap the fizz.”
🥤 Said Coke is best shaken, not stirred.
🥤 Blond told Siri to pour her a Coke.
🥤 Used Coke as shampoo because “it says it adds body.”
What is a Blond Joke Drink
🍹 Blond ordered a screwdriver and asked for real tools.
🍹 She thought a Bloody Mary was a medical drink.
🍹 Tried to “light” her flaming shot with a flashlight.
🍹 Asked if a Long Island Iced Tea comes in family size.
🍹 Thought a tequila sunrise was a morning drink.
🍹 Asked the bartender to make her a “mocha mojito.”
🍹 Mixed coffee with gin and called it “energy regret.”
🍹 Thought an Old Fashioned was something her grandma drank.
🍹 Ordered “liquid courage” and got mouthwash.
🍹 Blond brought her own blender to the bar.
🍹 She added Red Bull to champagne and called it “bubbly wings.”
🍹 Called rum and Coke “pirate cola.”
🍹 Used margarita salt in her bath.
🍹 Thought tonic water was for sick drinks.
🍹 Asked if Irish coffee has an accent.
Blond Joke Brothers
👱♀️ Blond’s brother got locked in a grocery store and starved.
👱♀️ One brother glued the puzzle—then complained it wouldn’t work again.
👱♀️ The other thought Wi-Fi was short for “wife finder.”
👱♀️ They tried to wash a USB drive.
👱♀️ One brother wore a helmet to bed “for dream safety.”
👱♀️ The other one posted a letter through a vending machine.
👱♀️ They played hide and seek and never found each other.
👱♀️ Blond’s brothers thought “Netflix and chill” meant blanket shopping.
👱♀️ Argued over whether the sun or moon is bigger.
👱♀️ Asked if email stamps need licking.
👱♀️ One asked Alexa to do his math homework.
👱♀️ The other thought CTRL+Z undoes spilled milk.
👱♀️ Called Bluetooth a dental condition.
👱♀️ One tried to charge his phone with a lemon.
👱♀️ Said Siri is their third sibling.
Dirty Blond Joke
😏 Blond studied for a urine test.
😏 She thought a strip club was a place to buy wallpaper.
😏 Called 911 because her vibrator had a dead battery.
😏 Used whipped cream as hair mousse.
😏 Thought “booty call” was shoe shopping.
😏 Said she was grounded—because she plugged in too many toys.
😏 Got fired from a nude beach for being overdressed.
😏 Asked why adult movies don’t have bloopers.
😏 Thought a G-string was guitar equipment.
😏 Wore edible underwear to a salad bar.
😏 Said “Netflix and chill” means pajamas and popcorn.
😏 Told her diary she wants to be a pole dancer.
😏 Blond applied body glitter for a Zoom interview.
😏 Thought a threesome was a math term.
😏 Said she uses whipped cream as sunscreen for flavor.
Blond Joke Firework
🎆 Blond tried to light fireworks with a flashlight.
🎆 She thought a sparkler was a fancy pen.
🎆 Set fireworks off in the house to “test them first.”
🎆 Asked if fireworks come with a mute option.
🎆 Wore sunglasses at night to “watch responsibly.”
🎆 Put sparklers in her birthday cake.
🎆 Tried to light fireworks with a scented candle.
🎆 Asked if fireworks were vegan.
🎆 Thought Roman candles were imported from Italy.
🎆 Threw firecrackers in the freezer “for safety.”
🎆 Called 911 when the fireworks were too loud.
🎆 Thought firework shows were natural events.
🎆 Brought a fire extinguisher as a plus-one.
🎆 Lit fireworks indoors because “the wind messes them up.”
🎆 Told people she invented fireworks by accident.
Blond Joke Meme
📸 Blond meme: “Tried to connect to Bluetooth… now dating a speaker.”
📸 Meme of blond blow-drying her ice cubes.
📸 Caption: “Microwave your salad to kill the calories.”
📸 She put a ruler on her phone to measure memory.
📸 Blond using nail polish to fix a broken iPad.
📸 Meme of her Googling “how to use Google.”
📸 Holding a plunger as a microphone.
📸 Blond holding a fish with the caption: “My cat’s Wi-Fi pet.”
📸 Drawing a USB port on the wall to charge her phone.
📸 Wearing oven mitts to use the toaster.
📸 Meme of her typing “LOL” in a voicemail.
📸 Trying to print a TikTok.
📸 Said “VPN” is a new energy drink.
📸 Blond using a pizza as a mouse pad.
📸 Meme: “Reboot your fridge for a cold start.”
Blond Joke Memes
😂 A meme where she tried to bleach her brain.
😂 Meme of her mailing a text message.
😂 Used lipstick to sign a PDF.
😂 Said she updated her car by yelling “refresh.”
😂 Blond set her alarm for 12 PM and missed the day.
😂 Believed “cloud storage” meant sky drive.
😂 Using a banana as a phone in a meeting.
😂 Her browser history includes “how to Google.”
😂 Drew a clock on her wrist instead of buying a watch.
😂 Believed incognito mode made her invisible.
😂 Meme caption: “I reset the microwave clock to fix the internet.”
😂 Thought Amazon Prime is a superhero.
😂 Said 5G causes spicy food.
😂 Blond using Instagram filters in a mirror.
😂 Meme: “I clicked uninstall on life—waiting for it to reboot.”
Blond Joke of The Day
🌞 Blond tried to climb the glass elevator for exercise.
🌞 Said her credit score is high because she memorized it.
🌞 Asked if the moon has Wi-Fi.
🌞 Got a job at the mirror factory—still waiting to see herself succeed.
🌞 Said shampoo instructions are confusing—“I never know when to stop.”
🌞 Thought a resume is a list of her favorite TV shows.
🌞 Mistook a stapler for a phone charger.
🌞 She reported her reflection as an intruder.
🌞 Asked if the library has an audiobook section for selfies.
🌞 Said water is heavy when it’s “wet.”
🌞 Tried to inflate her tires with a hairdryer.
🌞 Blond: “I downloaded more RAM from a shopping site.”
🌞 Said fast food is food you eat while running.
🌞 Tried to crop her hair using Photoshop.
🌞 Told Siri: “I’m ready to upgrade my brain.”
Conclusion
Blond jokes are timeless, cheeky, and perfect for sharing laughs without taking life too seriously. Whether you like your humor clean, dirty, meme-styled, or themed—this list offers it all. Laugh responsibly and share generously!
Silva is a humor enthusiast and pun aficionado who loves turning everyday situations into laugh-out-loud moments. With a keen eye for witty wordplay and a knack for relatable jokes, Silva brings a unique, playful perspective to every article. When not crafting clever puns, Silva enjoys exploring pop culture trends and sharing funny anecdotes that brighten readers’ days. Follow Silva’s hilarious adventures and discover endless chuckles at jokesplanets.com.
