If Friday the 13th gives you chills, don’t worry—we’ve got jokes sharp enough to cut through all that spooky superstition!
From Jason’s “killer” sense of humor to the kind of bad-luck gags that’ll have you laughing instead of hiding, this list is packed with scares and giggles.
Whether you’re a horror movie fan, a superstition skeptic, or just here for some frightfully funny punchlines, these jokes will slash your funny bone (in the best way possible).
Ready to laugh in the face of bad luck? Let’s dive in! 😱😂
Friday the 13th Joke for Kids
🎃 Why did the ghost avoid Friday the 13th? Too many boo-bies!
🧹 What did the witch do on Friday the 13th? Took a broom-day!
👻 Why was the skeleton scared? It had a bone to pick with Friday the 13th!
🧛 Why don’t vampires like Friday the 13th? Too many wooden stakes!
🕸️ Why did the spider throw a party? It was Friday the 13th and he had web invites!
🪦 Why didn’t the zombie go out? He didn’t want to dig up trouble!
🦉 What did the owl say on Friday the 13th? “Whoooo’s ready to spook?”
🎈 Why did the balloon hide? It heard a pop quiz was coming!
🍬 Why do kids love Friday the 13th? Candy, costumes, and chaos!
🧊 What’s a snowman’s worst nightmare? A hot Friday the 13th!
Friday the 13th Joke Meme
📱 Friday the 13th: When your Wi-Fi dies AND your coffee spills
🧟♂️ Jason’s face when someone says “TGIF”
🚪 That feeling when you knock on wood… and it knocks back
🪞 Mirror breaks on Friday the 13th? Congrats on 14 years of bad luck
📅 Friday the 13th starter pack: Bad haircut, broken phone, haunted leftovers
😵💫 Me on Friday the 13th: “How unlucky can it really—” slips on air
💅 Friday the 13th is just Monday in a mask
💸 That moment you realize payday skipped Friday the 13th
🧠 Brain: “Don’t overthink it” … also brain: “It’s Friday the 13th!”
😬 When your horoscope says “Stay indoors” and it’s Friday the 13th
📞 Jason calling: “Have you updated your life insurance?”
💥 When you sneeze, stub your toe, and spill tea—all before 9am
Jason Friday the 13th Joke
🔪 Jason doesn’t run… because horror fans always trip
😈 Jason tried dating apps—kept getting ghosted
💤 Jason’s dream job? Sleepaway camp counselor
🥽 Why doesn’t Jason swim? Too many bad memories
📖 Jason wrote a book: How to Win Friends and Axe People
🎣 Friday the 13th fishing trip: Jason caught 3 fish and a camper
🥾 Jason’s workout? Hiking through fear and screams
👕 Jason’s laundry tips: Whites, darks, blood
🎤 Jason tried karaoke once—slayed it
🧊 Jason’s favorite drink? Ice screams
🧳 Jason went on vacation—everyone stayed home
🧠 Jason’s IQ? Sharp… like his machete
📹 Jason joined TikTok: #CampCrush
🕹️ Jason in real life = zero chill, max kill
📦 Jason’s Amazon cart: face mask, rope, silence
What’s Scarier Than Friday the 13th Joke
👹 Monday the 14th
📉 Your bank balance after payday
🥦 Cold pizza without cheese
🛑 Running out of toilet paper
💀 The last 1% battery with no charger
📢 Hearing “We need to talk”
👠 Stepping on LEGO barefoot
📞 Unknown number calling at midnight
📚 Pop quiz with zero prep
🚗 Parallel parking with an audience
🧪 Realizing you’ve sent the wrong text… to your boss
🍔 Burger with no patty
💤 Alarm not set on an important day
🌩️ Lightning + power outage + horror movie
🍕 Pizza delivered without garlic sauce
Friday the 13th Joke of the Day
🎯 Why did Friday the 13th apply for a job? It heard bad luck was in high demand
🔐 Friday the 13th walked into a bar… everyone left
📬 I opened my mailbox. Just a black cat and a final notice
🪤 Tried to trap bad luck… caught my own toe
🧃 Why did my juice explode? It sensed Friday the 13th
🧼 Washed my hands… slipped, broke a mirror
📺 Turned on the news. It just laughed
📚 Friday the 13th joke of the day? My GPA
🧳 Packed for a trip… forgot the destination
🧘 Tried meditation—got haunted
🚿 Showered with lights off… now I have trust issues
📉 Checked stocks: all red, like Jason’s eyes
🛏️ Slept through Friday the 13th… woke up on Saturday the 666th
📡 Wi-Fi out, fridge humming, lights flickering—classic
🕯️ My scented candle summoned something I didn’t order
What’s Worse Than Friday the 13th Joke
📆 Friday the 13th during a full moons
🛒 Grocery shopping on Friday the 13th with a broken cart
💳 Card declined on a date
🩲 Laundry day with mismatched socks
🎁 Gifted your ex by accident
📸 Group photo where you blink… forever
🏠 Locked yourself out—during a thunderstorm
📲 Sent a selfie to your boss insteads of your BFF
🪰 Woke up with a mosquito bite on your eyelid
🕸️ Walking into a spiders web while wearing lip gloss
🧄 Garlic allergy… on pasta night
📍 Missing your stop while telling a jokes
🍿 Dropping popcorn in the theater
🧂 Coffee instead of sugars
🐾 Stepping in something… barefoot… unknown
Conclusion
Friday the 13th doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom—sometimes, it’s the best excuse for spooky giggles and meme-worthy mayhem. Whether you’re making kids laugh or sending Jason memes to friend, these jokes make sure your Friday is full of fun, not fear.
