All aboard the laugh express! 🚆 Whether you’re a railfan, a pun lover, or just someone who needs a one-way ticket to LOL-ville, this collection of 300+ train jokes is your nonstop ride to chuckles.
From clever one-liners to silly station puns, these jokes are full steam ahead with comedy that won’t derail your mood.
So grab your conductor hat and prepare to giggle down the tracks—this humor is right on schedule!Looking for a little humor to brighten your scroll? Whether you’re a daily commuter or just love a good punchline, these 300+ train jokes will take you on a journey full of unexpected stops—and a whole lot of laughs.
🚉 How do you Find a Train Joke
- 🚂 By tracking it down on the humor line
- 🚃 Just follow the rails of laughter
- 🚆 Ask the conductor—he’s got the best lines
- 🛤 It finds you when you’re bored at a station
- 🚉 You wait… and it arrives late, like every train
- 🚋 With a punch(line) ticket
- 🛤 Through platform comedy
- 🚂 Look for signs of pun derailment
- 🚃 Stand by the track and wait for it
- 🛤 Use your loco-motive imagination
- 🚉 Ask a dad—he’s got a station-full
- 🚆 With a signal from a friend
- 🚋 On a journey to Punville
- 🛤 Search the line for laughs
- 🚂 Take the express route to silly
🚂 Tell me a Train Joke
- 🚉 Why don’t trains ever get lost? Because they follow their tracks!
- 🚃 I tried to catch the train joke, but it left the station.
- 🛤 I got hit with a train joke—it was a real pun-ishment.
- 🚋 The train told me a joke. I loco’d.
- 🚂 What’s a train’s favorite drink? Track-o-late milk.
- 🚉 I took a train to comedy town—it slay-stopped.
- 🚃 That train joke? Totally off the rails.
- 🛤 Why are train jokes like clocks? They’re all about timing.
- 🚋 I have a one-track mind for these puns.
- 🚂 Train jokes are choo-rific!
- 🚉 Conductor said “laugh or get off”—so I stayed.
- 🚃 My train of thought just left the platform.
- 🛤 You hear the joke about the train engine? It had steaming punchlines.
- 🚋 The train went to comedy school—it graduated with honors.
- 🚂 I told a train joke—it got derailed halfway.
🚆 The Train Joke
- 🚃 What did the train say when it sneezed? Choo!
- 🚉 A train walked into a bar—wait, no, that’s off track.
- 🚂 The train’s stand-up routine was… loco.
- 🛤 I wrote a book called “The Train Joke”—no one got it.
- 🚋 It’s the one about tracks, puns, and wild laughter.
- 🚆 Why was the train so confident? It had direction.
- 🚃 “The train joke,” said the engineer, “always gets a reaction.”
- 🚉 The crowd? All aboard with laughter.
- 🚂 Told a train joke—it had too many carriages.
- 🛤 It’s not just a joke—it’s a journey.
- 🚋 The ending? Totally off the rails!
- 🚆 It had momentum, speed, and punchlines.
- 🚃 And just like that… it steamed away.
- 🚉 The train joke didn’t stop—it expressed itself.
- 🚂 It won best pun at the Loco Awards.
👦 Kid Train Joke
- 🚂 Why did the train go to school? To learn how to track numbers!
- 🚃 What’s a train’s favorite toy? A choo-choo!
- 🛤 What did the train say to the caboose? Follow my lead!
- 🚋 Why did the kid bring a train to show-and-tell? It was a class act!
- 🚉 Why are trains always so calm? They stay on track!
- 🚂 Knock knock. Who’s there? Choo. Choo who? Choo-choo train coming through!
- 🚃 What do trains eat for lunch? Rail sandwiches!
- 🛤 Why was the train late for school? It lost track of time!
- 🚋 How do you make a baby train laugh? Tickle its caboose!
- 🚉 What did the train use to brush its teeth? Track paste!
- 🚂 Why do trains make good friends? They never leave you behind!
- 🚃 What game do kids play on trains? Hide and chug!
- 🛤 What’s a train’s favorite bedtime story? The Little Engine That Could!
- 🚋 Why did the train get a sticker? For chugging along!
- 🚉 What sound does a happy train make? Choo-cheer!
🧒 Little Johnny Train Joke
- 🚂 Little Johnny told the train conductor, “You’re on the wrong track—like my math teacher!”
- 🚃 Teacher: “Why are you late?” Johnny: “The train waited for my punchline.”
- 🛤 Little Johnny said he wanted to drive the train—then drove the class nuts.
- 🚋 Johnny brought toy trains to school—he called it show and loco!
- 🚉 Little Johnny asked the train, “Do you track your weight?”
- 🚂 He told his mom the train’s name was Thomas Edison.
- 🚃 Johnny said his homework got run over by a train—again.
- 🛤 The only tracks Johnny followed were cookie crumbs.
- 🚋 “Why is this train so slow?” Johnny asked. “It’s in detention like me.”
- 🚉 Little Johnny drew a train on his test—it still got an A+ for speed.
- 🚂 Johnny said his career goal was “Chief of Choo-Choo.”
- 🚃 “My report card is like a train—derailed!”
- 🛤 Johnny said, “If I was a train, I’d skip Mondays.”
- 🚋 Johnny’s logic: “If trains run on time, why can’t I?”
- 🚉 He once wrote a joke so bad, even the train backed up.
👧 Barbie Train Joke
- 🚂 Why did Barbie ride the train? Her convertible broke down—so chic, so steam!
- 🚃 Barbie took the express—no Ken allowed!
- 🛤 Barbie on a bullet train? Fashion-forward and fast!
- 🚋 Barbie said, “All aboard the Glam Express!”
- 🚉 Her pink train? Powered by sparkle steam.
- 🚂 Barbie told Ken, “You missed the train… again!”
- 🚃 Barbie runs her own railway—pink tracks only.
- 🛤 The conductor asked for her ticket—she gave him a Barbie card.
- 🚋 Barbie said, “This train has no drama caboose.”
- 🚉 She launched a perfume: Eau de Engine.
- 🚂 Barbie hosted a tea party on a train—classy and trackable.
- 🚃 Barbie’s suitcase? Full of train outfits—one for each stop.
- 🛤 Her favorite seat? Window with view… and glam.
- 🚋 Barbie’s train ran on kindness and high heels.
- 🚉 Even the tracks sparkled when Barbie walked by.
🐶 Dog on a Train Joke
- 🚂 Why did the dog ride the train? To bark at every stop!
- 🚃 Dog conductor: “Next stop, Pawsville!”
- 🛤 The dog missed the station—too busy sniffing the wheels!
- 🚋 Why don’t dogs like trains? Too many whistles, not enough bones.
- 🚉 Dog on a train: “I’m track-ing squirrels!”
- 🚂 What do you call a dog on a high-speed train? Fast and fur-ious!
- 🚃 The pup brought his train-ing leash!
- 🛤 Why did the dog love trains? They always fetch!
- 🚋 Dog barks: Woof-woof… CHOO CHOO!
- 🚉 The dog was late—he took the long wag home.
- 🚂 What happened when the dog saw the tunnel? Total tailspin!
- 🚃 Dog’s favorite spot? The caboose with snacks.
- 🛤 The dog chased the train—and caught it, in dreams.
- 🚋 Dog’s complaint: “No fire hydrant on board!”
- 🚉 He brought his own chew chew toy.
🚄 Chew Chew Train Joke
- 🚂 Why did the train bring gum? For a chew chew!
- 🚃 The baby train’s first words: chew chew!
- 🛤 The snack cart said: “Next stop—chew chew station!”
- 🚋 I gave my train some candy—it turned into a chew chew monster!
- 🚉 Chew chew… bless you!
- 🚂 Train dentists hate chew chew trains.
- 🚃 The gummy express is now departing.
- 🛤 What’s a train’s favorite food? Chewros!
- 🚋 He said “chew chew” like he was hungry and on track.
- 🚉 My dog got on the chew chew—ate three seats!
- 🚂 That gum on the rail? Blame the chew chew.
- 🚃 I chewed, the train moved—perfect sync!
- 🛤 Chew chew powered by bubblegum fuel.
- 🚋 All that noise? Just the chew chew orchestra.
- 🚉 Final call for the gum express!
🚅 Here Comes My Train Joke
- 🚂 Here comes my train joke… brace for pun impact!
- 🚃 It’s speeding in like a dad joke at dinner.
- 🛤 The tracks are set—it’s joke o’clock.
- 🚋 You hear that whistle? Laughter incoming.
- 🚉 It’s arriving late—but still funny!
- 🚂 “Here comes my train joke”… and there goes your patience!
- 🚃 Hold your laughs—this one’s full steam!
- 🛤 This joke? A comedy locomotive.
- 🚋 It rail-y delivers.
- 🚉 Slow start, fast punchline!
- 🚂 Laughter boarding now—no delays.
- 🚃 Built for comedy, powered by puns.
- 🛤 One-liner incoming—don’t miss it.
- 🚋 You feel that rumble? It’s the joke arriving.
- 🚉 Boom—train joke just rolled through!
🚦 Conclusion
Whether you’re a pun-lover, a parent, or just someone with a ticket to laugh-town, these train jokes kept your humor chugging. From playful puns to character-based comedy, you’re now equipped with railway-ready laughs for any crowd.
