Alright, let’s be honest — adult life’s stressful, and sometimes you just need a good laugh that’s a little on the naughty side.
This list of 300+ Best Jokes for Grown-Ups Who Love Naughty Humor is here to tickle your funny bone (and maybe your imagination too).
No lectures, no filters — just cheeky giggles, wink-worthy punchlines, and humor that says, “We’re all adults here.
” So grab your sense of humor, park your seriousness at the door, and let’s dive into the kind of laughter your inner rebel will love.
Colin Jost Vagina Joke
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- Why did Colin Jost describe the vagina as a political debate? Because everyone has an opinion but no one wants to go in.
- Colin said the vagina is like Times Square—beautiful but full of confused tourists.
- He claimed the vagina is nature’s Rubik’s cube—easy to mess up, impossible to master.
- Said on “Weekend Update”: “The vagina is like a haunted house—enter if you dare, but don’t scream.”
- “You think you understand it, then it surprises you—like my wife’s side of the closet.”
- Vagina: The only place where GPS fails, and no one wants to ask for directions.
- Colin joked it’s like the stock market—risky, volatile, and mostly run by men who don’t get it.
- “It’s the only opening that closes more the more you try to understand it.”
- “Talking about vaginas on SNL is like playing Minesweeper with your career.”
- Compared it to the NYC subway—damp, mysterious, and surprisingly loud.
- “My gynecologist friend says the vagina is like a work of art—hard to explain, easy to ruin.”
- Joked it’s like jury duty—everyone talks about it, no one wants to do it wrong.
- “They say love is found in the heart. I say it’s found somewhere just south of it.”
- Called it “the real Wonder Woman.”
- “The vagina has more security than the White House.”
Scarlett Johansson Vagina Joke
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- Scarlett joked: “The vagina isn’t just magical, it’s Marvel-level powerful.”
- “Mine’s got a better security system than my iPhone.”
- “They say Black Widow is deadly—I just wink.”
- “If you want to find it, bring a map, a light, and some respect.”
- “He thought he’d seen it all—till he met me.”
- “My vagina has more plot twists than a Nolan movie.”
- “They said I was intimidating—maybe I just have premium parts.”
- “He wanted a superhero. I gave him a boss level.”
- “It’s not about being tight—it’s about being right.”
- “They tried to cancel me once. My vagina clapped back.”
- “I bring more heat than an Avengers fight scene.”
- “Dating me is like dating your mom’s warning.”
- “If beauty were a weapon, mine would be nuclear.”
- “You think you can handle me? Honey, I handled Thanos.”
- “They asked if I was high maintenance. I said I come with special effects.”
Snl Vagina Joke
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- “The vagina—more confusing than SNL’s plot twists.”
- “Even SNL can’t write better material than a woman’s anatomy.”
- “Vagina: the punchline no one can resist but everyone fears.”
- “SNL writers avoid the vagina like it’s a HR meeting.”
- “The vagina’s been through more sketches than Kenan Thompson.”
- “Every episode has one hidden vagina joke—like an Easter egg in a Marvel movie.”
- “Weekend Update: where vaginas are metaphors, not monologues.”
- “They pitched a whole skit called ‘Vaginal Confusion’—got axed by Standards.”
- “SNL: Sketch, Nerves, and Lube.”
- “Colin Jost’s jokes land, but vagina jokes always hit harder.”
- “A vagina on SNL is a guest star with no screen time.”
- “Live from New York—it’s slightly inappropriate!”
- “They bleeped the word but kept the joke.”
- “Even Alec Baldwin won’t touch this topic.”
- “The vagina got better lighting than half the cast.”
Betty White Vagina Joke
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- “My vagina is older than most of your presidents.”
- “It’s not dry, it’s just seasoned.”
- “Honey, this thing’s seen more action than WWII.”
- “If my vagina could talk, it’d demand royalties.”
- “I may be 90, but my lady garden still blooms.”
- “Back in my day, we called it the forbidden fruit—now it’s just gluten-free.”
- “Golden Girls weren’t just about friendship, you know.”
- “It’s not a wrinkle—it’s a roadmap.”
- “Even at my age, men still salute it.”
- “I once told a man to get lost—and he enjoyed it.”
- “It’s not dusty, it’s vintage.”
- “Every wrinkle has a memory.”
- “If my vagina had a passport, it’d be platinum.”
- “They say age before beauty—I say why not both?”
- “I don’t need Viagra, I am the stimulus.”
Scarlett Johansson Snl Vagina Joke
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- “I hosted SNL and the script said: be sexy. I brought the whole uterus.”
- “Colin writes the jokes, I just make them seductive.”
- “My vagina has more camera time than half the cast.”
- “It’s the only thing that hasn’t been recast on SNL.”
- “Lorne asked for edge—I gave him curves.”
- “They told me to improvise—I flashed my pelvic power.”
- “SNL stands for Scarlett’s Naughty Lips.”
- “Sketch comedy? More like snatch comedy.”
- “I once acted with my eyes—he remembered my thighs.”
- “Colin got lucky. I got ratings.”
- “Even Kenan asked if it was scripted.”
- “I didn’t break—he did.”
- “That ‘Weekend Update’ had a wet ending.”
- “My sketch had more curves than the cold open.”
- “It’s not method acting—it’s muscle memory.”
Roast Beef Vagina Joke
- “Her vagina looked like it survived a deli war.”
- “More flaps than a broken tent.”
- “Is that roast beef or a secret portal?”
- “Extra meat, hold the mystery.”
- “That thing had its own Arby’s franchise.”
- “He went down and came back with mustard.”
- “It whispered ‘We have the meats.’”
- “So meaty, even vegetarians blushed.”
- “Not a vagina, a buffet.”
- “Even the butcher was confused.”
- “She’s packing a full lunch down there.”
- “Floppier than my grandma’s curtains.”
- “He said ‘Hello?’ It echoed ‘A sandwich?’”
- “You could lose a wallet in that thing.”
- “So beefy, it mooed.”
Sarah Silverman Vagina Joke
- “My vagina’s Jewish, sarcastic, and mildly traumatized.”
- “It’s kosher, but barely.”
- “Not tight—just passive aggressive.”
- “Even my vagina interrupts with a punchline.”
- “It’s had more therapy than me.”
- “If it could tweet, it’d be canceled.”
- “My vagina once dated a guy just to judge him.”
- “It drinks oat milk and critiques porn.”
- “It smells like rebellion and patchouli.”
- “Even my OBGYN says ‘wow.’”
- “It’s like an indie film—confusing but award-worthy.”
- “Sometimes it ghostwrites my jokes.”
- “If it had a job, it’d be a cynical barista.”
- “It bleeds feminism.”
Super Vagina Joke
- “Faster than a speeding heartbreak.”
- “Can stop bullets—or at least bad pickup lines.”
- “My vagina wears a cape, but only on weekends.”
- “It’s a bird, it’s a plane—it’s pleasure.”
- “This superhero doesn’t need saving.”
- “It’s got more powers than the Avengers.”
- “Even Kryptonite can’t weaken it.”
- “Sidekick? Please, it’s the main character.”
- “Villains disappear inside it.”
- “X-ray vision? No, just intense eye contact.”
- “It has its own theme music.”
- “Flies solo, but never alone.”
- “Not your average origin story.”
- “Leaps bad decisions in a single bound.”
- “Even Marvel took notes.”
Funny Vagina Joke
- “Why did the vagina join stand-up? It had killer timing.”
- “Ever tried finding one in the dark? It’s the real Escape Room.”
- “Vagina: proof God has a sense of humor.”
- “It’s the only part of anatomy with attitude.”
- “Even Alexa doesn’t know where it is.”
- “It’s not a cave—it’s an enigma.”
- “Men fear it. Women own it.”
- “It’s the reason for wars and peace treaties.”
- “It’s like Wi-Fi—when it’s out, everything crashes.”
- “Even Google gets lost in it.”
- “A vagina walks into a bar… everyone shuts up.”
- “It has more secrets than the CIA.”
- “He thought it was a tunnel—turns out it’s a maze.”
- “It’s like a museum—look, don’t touch.”
- “Why did the vagina get promoted? She knew how to close.”
Conclusion
From SNL sketches to Scarlett’s sass and Betty’s boldness, vagina jokes have long been a punchy part of comedy. Whether cheeky, clever, or flat-out wild, these jokes entertain while walking the fine line of outrageous and relatable. Laughter truly is the best way to appreciate anatomy.
Jon Arnold is a passionate writer and humor enthusiast who loves breaking down funny moments, memes, and quirky jokes for readers of all ages. With a knack for making complex ideas simple and entertaining, Jon shares his witty insights on everything from text slang to pop culture laughs. You can find all of his playful, pun-filled content at jokesplanets.com, where he keeps smiles, giggles, and good vibes coming every day.
